5 Tips for navigating the over 50’s online dating scene

My dating journey began in my 40’s.

I was clueless about both men and online dating.

So much so that today, I still wince at how often I allowed a man to make me his email or phone pal.

Truthfully back then, I was thrilled by the attention.

Since he’d picked ME out of every other woman online to speak with, I felt like it was my female duty to let him talk about himself for hours on end.

Night after night, I listened to the description of his day and what he thought of everything in his world.

But, guess what?

Not one ever asked me on a date.

I had to learn the hard way how to set boundaries with these men. I don’t want you to have to do the same thing so I’d like to share with you 5 tips about Online Dating that will help make your cyber experience so much easier.

Tip #1-Why he doesn’t look like his picture

Some men’s profiles and pictures look pretty good on dating sites.

Yet, when you meet you wonder who this man is since he looks and acts nothing like the amazing man you saw online or spoke with on the phone.

Why does this happen?

I remember looking at men online and thinking, “Oh, I could be the next Mrs. So and So and we’d have the best life filled with all the wonderful activities he talked about in his profile.

Well, what I was doing was making up a story about a man based on his pictures and profiles.

Then I’d meet him and think, he’s nothing like his profile.

Yet, he was.

What happened was the story I had created was based on my interpretation not on reality.

Once I figured this out, I stopped telling myself stories about who a man might be.

Instead, I went on a date with no expectations other than to meet a new and interesting man.

I stopped being disappointed and actually began having a lot more fun dating.

Tip #2-Can I write to men?

Well, that’s a mixed bag.

They will tell you they love it when women write to them.

Yet, when I’ve asked quite a few Alpha Males if it went anywhere, not one said it did.

That’s because Alpha Men love the chase and want to pursue you and that’s why I recommend letting men write to you 1st.

So how do you get his attention?

Favor him.

This way he knows you’re interested and if he too is interested and also a paid member of the site, he’ll write you back.

So does this mean you can never write to men?

You can but I’ve found is men will write you back but communication will usually fizzle after 2-3 emails.

Now that being said, I know of 2 very good relationships where the woman contacted the man first.

It’s always worth a try if you are really interested in a man.

Tip #3-Is it worth talking to him on the phone before meeting?

Many times men want to text or go right to the meet and greet.

The advantage of speaking first is it gives you the opportunity to screen a man.

What do I mean by this?

I once had a man ask me to meet him at an ice cream shop.

I thought it was a really novel idea and could be fun.

The problem was he didn’t have a job and therefore no money to even treat me to an ice cream cone.

Had we spoken before we met, I’d have found out he wasn’t working and I’d have said, “I’m sorry, we’re not a match.”

It is worth squeezing in at least one call to see if he’s date-worthy so you aren’t wasting your time on the wrong men.

Tip #4 –Is it better to meet for coffee or a meal?

Men will often ask you out for lunch or dinner because unlike women, they don’t have friends to share a meal with.

There is nothing wrong with sharing a meal on a first date unless it turns out you don’t like him once you meet.

Then that dinner date can end up feeling like an eternity before you can excuse yourself and leave.

I preferred meeting men at a coffee shop or for a drink.

The date is short and sweet and you can be out of there within half an hour or less once your beverage is done.

If things are going well, the two of you can always continue the conversation over dinner.

Tip #5-How do I get a second date if I like him?

Here’s a mantra I want you to remember when you don’t get a second date.

“A man is not rejecting you personally when he doesn’t ask you for a second date. It’s just you don’t fit the picture in his head of who he thinks he wants.”

Think of all the times you’ve done this with men.

They show up and don’t fit who you want so you say NO too.

When a man says he’ll call you but doesn’t . . . don’t write, text or call him.

Just get back online or out into the real world and move on to the next guy.

You want a man who’s interested in getting to know you not a man you have to aggressively pursue to ask you out again.

Sometimes it takes kissing a few frogs to get to your Prince.

Be patient and just keep at it.

He’s out there waiting for you!

Now here’s something fun when you’re trying to figure out if a guy is right for you.

My friend and colleague, Carol Allen does these cool Right Man Reports.

With this report, you’ll find out how compatible you are, why you feel the way you do when you are together, and if your relationship would be a positive, fulfilling one in the future. It’s a no brainer at only $19.97.

The Right Man Report

I want to leave you with this wonderful email I got that I hope inspires you to know love is possible for you too!

Lisa, you are so right. There are good guys out there. I found the best!!! It’s official, Steve and I now have a home together. BTW . . . you can find love in your 60’s. I did with an amazing man who loves, adores and cherishes me!!!!! Biggest thanks to you for your amazing guidance and your Love after 50 Coaching Group! Love and hugs~ Leni, New York

Believing in You!

Your Next Steps to Love after 50. . . .

💞 Feeling like you are on a merry-go-round of mismatched dates? Lets press pause and talk about how we can write a new love story for you. Click here to start our conversation. Tell me your story – I am here to listen and guide you towards meeting someone truly special.

If you are still gearing up for that step, I have plenty of insights and inspiration for you:

1. Subscribe to my YouTube Channel for heartfelt dating wisdom and uplifting success stories from women who have been just where you are. They found love, and so can you. Click here to watch and learn.

2. Discover a new chapter in your dating life with my book, "The Winning Dating Formula." It is more than a book; it is your journey to love mapped out. And it is just a click away on Amazon. Click here and start attracting the love you deserve.

3. Join our Finding Love after 50 Facebook group to find camaraderie and connection. It is a warm and welcoming space to share your journey and receive support every step of the way. Click here to become part of our community.

4. On the lookout for a dating site that resonates with you? Browse through my personal selection of the best dating sites tailor-made for fabulous over 50s. Click here and say goodbye to guesswork.

Let these resources be your steppingstones to a love life filled with promise and joy. When you are ready, I am here to take that journey with you. Together, lets find your Mr. Right! 🌹

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