Dear Lisa…Help!  I Love A Wealthy Married Man!

 

Dear Lisa,
I don’t have trouble meeting men. The problem is I seem to always attract the wrong ones.  In looking back, I can see they’ve given me clues but for some reason I can’t see them at the time or I ignore them.  I really want to meet a great guy.  Help.

Doreen

 

Doreen,

To attract the right man, you’ll want to start by feeling great about who you are so you know your value.

Next, when you attract the wrong men, it’s usually because you don’t have a clear vision of the man you want in your life.

So get out pen and paper and write down your Deal Breakers and your Must Haves along with the qualities in a man that are Negotiable for you.

A Deal Breaker might be smoking.

A Must Have might be must be a good communicator.

A Negotiable Quality could be the amount of time you spend together.

This will give you a Road Map to look at every time you date someone new.

Refer back to your Road Map when deciding whether or not a man fits the idea of who you want in your life, especially in the Deal Breaker area.

After a date, write down your observations about a man – what you liked and disliked about him.

Don’t over analyze this or you’ll talk yourself out of men, possibly even missing great matches for you.

Just use it to help you get a clearer vision of who you want to spend time with in a romantic relationship.

Also use it as a guide to help you stop ignoring the warning signs you say you’re missing.

Keep going out with different men. As you do, you’ll get even clearer on the qualities you’ll want in the man and the relationship you desire.

 

Dear Lisa,

I met the nicest man at a hotel bar about 6 months ago.  We hit it off right away.  He’s very wealthy, loves to take me to nice restaurants, and the sex is the best I’ve ever had.  The downside is he’s married.

From what he tells me, his wife is a shopaholic.  He’s tired of her spending all their money on clothes she never wears.  They don’t sleep in the same bedroom and about the only time they are together is at social obligations.  They literally pass in the halls of this huge house they live in, barely saying hello to each other.

He’s told me he cares for me and really appreciates being able to share his feelings with me.  He also says he cherishes me and talking with me is the highlight of his day.  I am so crazy in love with him.  So my question is, how do I get him to leave his wife so the two of us can be together?  Thank you.  I love what you write and I really value what you think.  Do I have a chance with him?  Anonymous

 

Dear Anonymous,

If you value my advice then I hope you’ll hear me say this: STOP THIS RELATIONSHIP IMMEDIATELY!

You’re living in a fantasy relationship based on secrecy and great sex – two chemical reactions that amp up the hormones and the chemistry between you.

This man’s marriage is typical of many long relationships where complacency and boredom have set in.

He is obviously not looking to leave his wife. There’s too much history between them.

What he’s looking for is to spice up his life with excitement and this is the SERVICE you are providing him.

Men don’t need to have feelings for you to have sex with you. And they don’t need to love you to share their lives with you.

They just need to feel safe enough to do it.

The problem is you’ve fallen crazy in love with an UNAVAILABLE MAN.

If you stay with him, you will be his sounding board and his sexual outlet. But you will never be the woman he spends Thanksgiving or Christmas with.

Your life will be on hold as you wait for the next time he contacts you.

It’s now up to you to decide if this is enough for you.

If it’s not, end it.  Block him from your phone and email. Then take some time to heal and get to know you again.

When you’re ready… Get out there and look for a good man who will be emotionally, spiritually and physically available to you.

You deserve nothing less!

 

Please check out my latest post over on Huffington Post: Is Your Ideal Man George or Tom?

I’d love to hear from you! Ask me your burning questions, or post a comment using the buttons below.

Until next time~

Believing in You!

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Your Next Steps to Love after 50. . . .

💞 Feeling like you are on a merry-go-round of mismatched dates? Lets press pause and talk about how we can write a new love story for you. Click here to start our conversation. Tell me your story – I am here to listen and guide you towards meeting someone truly special.

If you are still gearing up for that step, I have plenty of insights and inspiration for you:

1. Subscribe to my YouTube Channel for heartfelt dating wisdom and uplifting success stories from women who have been just where you are. They found love, and so can you. Click here to watch and learn.

2. Discover a new chapter in your dating life with my book, "The Winning Dating Formula." It is more than a book; it is your journey to love mapped out. And it is just a click away on Amazon. Click here and start attracting the love you deserve.

3. Join our Finding Love after 50 Facebook group to find camaraderie and connection. It is a warm and welcoming space to share your journey and receive support every step of the way. Click here to become part of our community.

4. On the lookout for a dating site that resonates with you? Browse through my personal selection of the best dating sites tailor-made for fabulous over 50s. Click here and say goodbye to guesswork.

Let these resources be your steppingstones to a love life filled with promise and joy. When you are ready, I am here to take that journey with you. Together, lets find your Mr. Right! 🌹

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On April 3, 2013   /   Dating Advice Over 50, Uncategorized